Slippery Slope

One drink 

does not make me

like you. 

But the wanting

that comes

with the peace

that drink brings,

and the lie

I tell myself

that I can handle it

does. 

I'm not you,

but oh 

how I could be.

Belief

I believe in the unseen,
the fairies and the elves,
the goblins and the magic thieves
hiding away your things.

I believe in unicorns
and magic spells,
an imagined life
you cannot buy or sell,
but must live
through the eyes of a child.

I believe in 398.2

Toxic

Your smoke
fills me up
until I cannot breathe.
It intoxicates me,
leaves me empty
when you blow
through me
like I am a chimney,
a vessel
just for you to push
through,
move endlessly
about me
like I am not there.

Mama

Cherokee cheekbones

and brown sun-soaked skin,

painted lips

anytime you leave home,

sunlit hair

out of a bottle,

and eyes as moody blue

as the Atlantic

on an overcast summer day - 

all of these things are you.

Keep On Driving

There's a blue skied horizon
straight ahead,
and I'm gonna just keep driving
until the gas runs out.

I'm gonna drive
past the line
where your eyes
can no longer see me
and just disappear
off the edge of the earth

Too bad the earth is round.

Chameleon

Your colors change

so easily

from one person 

to the next; 

like a chameleon

you blend in

with the one your with,

but I see you
for all you are
and all you're not.
And you should know
your colors

can't hide

how ugly
you really are. 

Shame

I have wrapped myself
in flesh
until I am no more.

Layer upon layer
I have built up
my body
until it is
an armored
fat suit
no one
could or would
penetrate.

Now you ask me
to peel back the flesh
like I am an onion
so easily moved.

The years do not melt
away just because
we want them to.

I'm not me
when I look in the mirror
but that doesn't mean
I know who I am
underneath
all these years
of emptiness.