Birthday Wishes

In 10 days,
I will celebrate
another birthday
without you.

It is the sixth time
I've had to do this
and it never gets easier.
I wish it would.
I wish a lot of things,
like that you were still here
and I could have
just one more day with you -
one day where I knew
it was the last one,
where I could take in
every smile,
every laugh,
every frown
and tear shed,
all of it
seared into my memory
because the last day
with you
was like many others
and I didn't know
I wouldn't get any more
so I took it
and you
for granted
like always.

If I were to light
all the candles
on your cake
and blow them out
for you,
I'd wish
for just
one more day
to say goodbye.